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Chris Brown and Rihanna Split for Good?

Chris Brown and Rihanna’s relationship has been extremely rocky and sometimes violent, but for some reason they were always going back to one another. They’d break up, get back together, break up, get back together and so on. No one ever really approved of their toxic relationship (not even Chris Brown’s father) so that might be one of the reasons they stayed together so long. It was one of those “us against the world” things. However, it appears the thrill of being a rebel has finally been squeezed out of Chris Brown, because he has finally put an end to their relationship.

Brown was on an Australian radio show named, “The Kyle and Jackie Show” last week and he revealed that he would be celebrating his May 5 birthday solo this year.  Brown said on the radio show,

“Yeah, Imma do it solo. I mean, at the end of the day, shawty doing her thang, she on the road…It’s always gonna be love. I’m just gonna do me. I’m a grown man. Just gotta fast forward.”

The host then asked Brown if he felt that he and Rihanna are soulmates.  Brown said,

The way I look at it is, I am always going to love that person. But people have differences and people have different wants and needs. And at the end of the day, she’s a young girl. I can’t really be focused on wife-ing somebody that young. At the end of the day. And I’m young too. So I can’t focus on that right now. I just need to fast forward and be a man and be the best Chris Brown I can be, instead of worrying about whoever else is going to be in my side pocket.”

What does that even mean? I love how he acts like Rihanna just turned 18 or something. I am pretty sure she is actually a year older than him, right? At least according to wikipedia, and we all know wikipedia would never publish something that isn’t true. Anyway, what was I talking about? Oh, yeah, what Chris Brown said made absolutely no sense! Worrying about who is in his side pocket? How big are your damn pockets, man? And I love how he pulls out the classic, “I’m just gonna do me.” line. Ah, yes! The classic break-up line.

Boy: Look, boo. You do you and I’m just gonna do me.

Girl: What you mean you just gonna do you? What the f–k that supposed to mean?

Boy: I just think it’s best if we both don’t do each other right now. You do you and I do me. Don’t make this a big deal.

Girl: Oh, don’t worry. You won’t be “doing” me anytime soon, baby boy. You best believe that. You’re going to be doing yourself from now on.

Boy: Don’t be like that.

That’s how I imagine Chris Brown broke up with Rihanna. They’ll be back together, though! Give it a few months or so, they’ll be doing each other again soon enough. They just can’t seem to quit each other. Timeouts? Sure, but they never will quit each other.

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